November 18, 2019

Addicts and their Families Need Support

Via Public Domain Photos
For a summer, I was a case manager at a day treatment center where several of the clients dealt with multiple addictions. I was too young to recognize all that I really could have done. But I have learned so much more about addiction and recovery.

Most of us know someone who deals with an addiction or compulsion. We may deal with an addiction or compulsion ourselves. It can be very difficult to be supportive for someone who has an addiction or compulsion. It is a balance between support and not enabling them in their bad habits.

The journey is very personal and not something we can always openly talk about. Sometimes, we suffer in private. There are resources for those who are the support system of addicts. We need to take that support for ourselves. We need to engage in regular self-care. If we haven't taken care of ourselves, we have nothing to give to anyone else. We need to also recognize that we cannot change the addict. Only the addict can change themselves.

Many spouses or other long-time support of addicts suffer from betrayal trauma. It is a form of relationship trauma and PTSD from dealing with the subtle or sometimes outright abuse. The abuse is sometimes unintentional, but it still hurts other people.

Professional help and support groups can help the support person and addict on the journey to healing and recovery.

When I was 10 years old, I stepped on a broken beer bottle at a local reservoir. I bled from the circle wound in my foot. My mom took me to the clinic where the doctor put in stitches. Someone's addiction to alcohol (and littering) caused my injury. But there was also a way to heal that injury.


Glass Shards



One bottle smashed to the ground
Two bottles smashed to the ground
One step into the street
Two steps into the street
One shard into my foot
Two shards into my feet

One bottle crushed in the puddle
Two bottles crushed in the puddle
One jump into the water
Two jumps into the water
One fragment in my calf
Two fragments in my calves

One truth smashed to the ground
Two truths smashed to the ground
One step down to hell
Two steps down to hell
One soul shred in two
Two souls shred in two

One lie crushed beneath our feet
Two lies crushed beneath our feet
One rung up the ladder
Two rungs up the ladder
One stitch in the wound
Two stitches in the wound


I believe in hope with the Savior for those hurt by addiction and the addicts. It may be long and difficult road, but worth the journey.


Spouse and Family Support:

Church of Jesus Christ Spouse and Family Guide
Al-Anon
Smart Recovery
PalGroup
American Addiction Centers

Sexual Compulsion Help:

Addressing Pornography-Church of Jesus Christ
Utah Coalition Against Pornography
Lifestar
The Betrayed, The Addicted, The Expert podcasts
Betrayal Trauma Recovery (spouse)

Addiction Recovery:
Church of Jesus Christ 12 step groups
Alcoholics Anonymous
List of Alcohol Addiction Recovery article
US National Helpline Substance Abuse 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
Narcotics Anonymous

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