October 28, 2014

Discriminating Against the Mostly Sane

A common tactic to discredit someone is to say they're crazy. "He's a little touched in the head, so he can't tell what's real or not." No, the majority of us know what's real. Some who do hallucinate still need to be taken seriously until proven otherwise since they are a common target for assault.

The media and others paint the mentally ill as violent, especially after a shooting. That criminal chose violence. Millions of us choose to manage our mental health in positive and healthy ways. Otherwise, everyone would be dead.

So who is really sane? No one on this earth is perfectly "sane" or "normal." Everyone has ups and downs in life. It just depends on how high or low the ups and downs are.

Scare Tactics

"Scared" by Capture Queen
"Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest."  Joshua 1:9

Lately, I've learned about the scare tactics abusers employ, usually through passive aggression. But no one has to be a victim of those scare tactics. When no one is afraid of an abuser, he or she loses much of his power. It helps to recognize these scare tactics.

1. Gifts. Yes, gifts are scare tactics. Abusers use gifts as a form of blackmail or tit-for-tat. They give you something and they expect silence and cooperation in return. You may not even recognize their "charity" as hush money. They also give gifts out of guilt.

2. Threats. These can be anything from death threats to much smaller things. Abusers threaten lawsuits, protective orders, hurting someone, or revealing someone's secrets, and so on. These threats are meant to keep people quiet or to lie.

3. False Accusations. When someone defies an abuser, the abuser will throw false accusations and frame others for their crimes. Abusers trump up false charges, file bogus protective orders, and sue for defamation of character. They also spread gossip to family, neighbors, communities, and the media. The abuser plays the victim.

4. Coach victims and witnesses. Abusers coach children to blame an innocent person. Children want to please adults, so some will repeat these things. (Always take what a child says seriously and find out the truth.)

5. Cause confusion. Abusers obscure the truth by accusing or framing others.

6. Discredit others. Abusers discredit victims, witnesses, and whistle blowers. A common tactic is to claim that the person is mentally unstable. (Mind you, most victims suffer from PTSD.) Or abusers reveal a person's sins. They may claim the person is possessed by devils. The types of attacks are endless.

Now you can be prepared for some of the typical scare tactics abusers use. You may not be able to avoid false accusations and being discredited, but stay true to yourself and God. God's opinion is the only one that counts in the end. Others who seek the truth will find it. Overall, stay calm so you don't play into their passive aggressive tendencies.

To Thrift Store Managers

I've walked into some charity thrift stores and I've cringed at the prices. The prices defeat the purposes of the charitable organization. But you have to apply some economics to understand.

1. You have a limitless supply of donated items, so you don't have to worry about making a certain amount per item.

2. Higher prices means fewer customers. Customers will buy more at lower prices and you will make more money. Besides, you'll save money on trash.

3. Price items below what you can buy them at Wal-Mart! Used items should really be less than half the price of new items. Remember, you have a limitless supply.

4. Thrift stores are supposed to provide items to others for an affordable price. Not everyone needs things given to them, but they do need to make ends meet on a budget.

I know people who avoid certain thrift stores because of the prices. These stores are losing money even though they think they're making more. Your goal is to make money to support your employees and other charity work you perform--not to hang onto items and throw more in the trash.

Thanks for reading.

Crazy Redhead

Donating to Thrift Stores

When I was pregnant with my first child I worked at a charity thrift store. I sorted shoes and clothes. People donated trash!

So here are some guidelines to donating:

1. Toss out trash. If it has mold, bodily fluid stains, holes, tears, or broken, throw it away. There are a few exceptions to broken items. If it's an antique, you can still donate it. Some places still accept holey shoes and clothes because they will repair them. Ask before you donate.

2. Clean items. It's the courteous thing to do. Most thrift stores do not clean items because of the large expense.

3. Donate with a giving heart.

October 26, 2014

How Awesome!

I look at my statistics and I'm amazed that so many of you readers come from around the world. People from three continents are looking at this blog. I find it so awesome!

The world feels like a smaller place with technology. I would love to visit so many countries, but I can't. However, I can see people from all around the world visit this blog.

Thanks for coming!

October 22, 2014

I Feel Trapped!

"Busy Clerk"
 by Vera Kratochvil
Several months ago, I told my husband I wanted to work outside the home after a trying day with the kids. I expounded how I felt trapped, repeating mundane chores, and overwhelmed. The kids only whined and wouldn't help out. The house was dirty and the kids only made it messier. I could go on.

My husband said, "I feel trapped too! I'm stuck at a desk for eight hours a day, every day."

I was stunned. He was "trapped" too and he likes his job most of the time. He has dealt with whiny coworkers and customers. His work is repetitive too. He has projects that overwhelm him. I've forgotten what it was like to work outside the home. I felt overwhelmed at times and had some unpleasant situations.

I realized that neither of us really has the advantage over the other. Being at home or working has pros and cons. But hey, when my coworkers and customers act childish, I can legally send them to their room.

October 19, 2014

Do I Get Anything Done?

"Child with Mom" by Diana Adams
The last week I've only written one article and I swear I'm going nuts. Shouldn't I get more done? Okay, so I'm chasing three boys around the house. That's a lot of work.

On top of that, housework piles up. I stared at my kitchen floor yesterday and vowed that we will have no more juice enter this house. (My husband buys juice--not me!) My two oldest feel so independent to pour their own juice, but not independent enough to clean their bedroom.

I get tons done. I keep my household running. Hopefully, this week I can get more done. I can only run as fast as I'm able.

October 14, 2014

Homeostasis in Abusive Homes

"Have a Seat" by Linnaea Mallette
We all like to be in our comfort zone--even if that zone isn't always the best place to be spiritually, emotionally, or physically. We fight when someone tears down our walls.

This concept of homeostasis applies to abusive homes and situations. No one wants to rock the boat in an abusive home, even if they've left that home. The abuser instills fear that runs deep in victims, witnesses, and favorites. He or she uses that to manipulate others. When someone breaks through that barrier, often no one wants to follow because of the consequences. Also, they are used to feeling beat down and, thus, they distrust unfamiliar, yet positive, influences.

Some victims, witnesses, or friends in the family will not incur the subtle wrath of the abuser. They are almost hardwired to close in ranks when someone threatens the abuser. Family members and friends sometimes defend the abuser and accuse the whistle blower or victim.

If you are stuck in an abuser's web, please break free. Please do what you can to help other victims caught in the web. You may need to call authorities, inform parents, or do other things. So often these victims are physically, emotionally, or spiritually unable to defend themselves, but you can make a difference.

October 04, 2014

New Article about Work from Home


Laundry...It Never Ends

I'm currently writing 150 articles about laundry and similar topics. I am less than halfway done and sometimes tire of writing about the mundane chore.

Starting Monday, I have to do more loads of laundry. Why can't we just wear the same clothes until they fall off our bodies? Who needs hygiene? My boys certainly don't care...but they certainly smell after awhile.

I have this crazy idea I want to write an eBook about laundry. I want to share how to do laundry in an eco-friendly, inexpensive way. I'm talking practical green solutions, not commercialism. Any takers?

Just push through 70+ short articles and I'll be home free from writing about laundry. But I'll never be free from doing laundry.