How to Gain Weight Quickly

Selfie

You know this is your true goal. Hardy-har-har.

I keep seeing articles about how to lose weight. People, this is not the answer! I tell you, you need a different mindset and solution. Good thing I know how to gain weight quickly — even 130 lbs. I’ve done it over the last 20 years. It’s rather simple really. Let me share my tips with you!

Medication with the Side Effect of Weight Gain

First, have an illness that requires medication with the side effect of extra hunger. Many mental illness medications will do that for you. (Okay, some balancing illness and side effects may be necessary.) This is how I gained my first 30 lbs. Even lots of exercise sometimes — like 3 hours of dancing, biking, and/or walking — won’t combat this.

Don’t Sleep at Night

Second, have manic episodes where you can’t fall asleep at night. This way you are tired during the day and can’t burn as many calories. I also suggest bedtime revenge procrastination. You have lots of stress and you feel out of control. This is how I gained probably lots of pounds. Honestly, I have no idea how much it contributed.

Overeating Because You Feel a Loss of Control

Second, engage in a binge eating disorder, but it can’t include any purging. Don’t worry. Just pretend you want to gain control in your life by the one thing you feel you can control: how much you eat. Or rather, that you have to eat when a cafeteria prepares it only three times a day. If you miss one, goodbye to a meal. So you overeat at each meal. I did this by eating extra food at each available meal. By the way, this habit will continue years after if you let it. This was probably some cause for 20/30 lbs. while starting new medications. Add another 10–20 lbs after that for feeling unable to control when I could eat.

Don’t Feel Normal

Getting on the right medication for the right diagnosis, thus reducing stress, will combat the weight gain process. I mean, that makes it so you sleep normal, eat normal, be normal. Sadly, I lost 10–15 lbs while staying extra busy. Too busy until I crashed after marriage. Wait, I may have been a little manic.

Bad Job, Birth Control Good for You

When you crash, make sure to crash real hard. Stay in a crummy job where they harass you, and go into a depressive mode for a few months. Oh, I forgot. Be on hormonal birth control too like so many women are at the same time as all the other fun stuff.

Shame, Shame Morning Sickness

But watch out for morning sickness during pregnancy. That will make you lose 16 lbs. Your ob/gyn will say it’s not a fun way to lose weight, but the results are good. (By the way, I switched to another doctor for the rest of my pregnancy. I wonder why.)

The key after that is to feel stressed and have a remaining binge disorder for a few years more. Oh, and joblessness. And post-partum depression. And switching to an even more infamous weight-gaining med. Pushing a stroller around with another friend may combat some of your progress. But drinking lots of lemonade to calm your stomach during your third pregnancy will help you gain back some weight.

Repeat the Cycle

You need to keep stressing over life. I can’t emphasize stressing enough. I mean it activates that cortisol, fight-or-flight, the lizard brain, increased hunger, all kinds of good stuff. You can do some exercise stuff, which will defeat your weight gain purpose. Luckily, the stress will usually kick back in. And don’t you dare learn coping techniques.

Bad Events, Trauma, All Fun Stuff

So my third son had a near-fatal accident three years ago and the family all had PTSD after. I can’t recommend this mysterious brain injury more. I mean, I gained 30 lbs. Don’t read The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk or get therapy. These might heal that brain injury. I mean, I had the best effects from PTSD, like anger, night terrors, blowup moments, and stress.

I can’t stress avoiding trauma-informed therapy enough — like exposure therapy, psychoeducation, EMDR, cognitive behavioral training, prayer and meditation, exercise, or talk therapy.

A Crappy Night’s Sleep

Now gaining weight might cause beneficial things like obstructing your airways at night. This is fun because you have sleep apnea, thus less oxygen at night. Crappy sleep will help you gain weight and increase your stress level. Don’t get help for sleep apnea — like a CPAP, mouth device, or oxygen at night.

Finally, Don’t Learn to Manage Stress

Stress is the best way to gain weight. I don’t recommend anything like professional help, exercise, meditation, coping techniques, a life coach, or adequate sleep. I mean stress probably caused most of my weight gain.

Seriously, Though

Yes, I have told you a tale of woe because I am sick of seeing quick hacks to a very real problem of obesity and eating disorders. Or the extremes of the body positivity movement that celebrates obesity. This is a serious epidemic that leads to many problems such as heart disease, high blood pressure, compromised immunity, lack of movement, and a shortened life span. Likewise, excessive weight loss causes many health problems too.

We must strive for balance and moderation, stress reduction, and accept that we can’t control outside circumstances. I personally recommend finding people to help you in your journey to be a healthy weight for you. Find friends, family, support groups, doctors, coaches, and so many others.

Lastly, our bodies are a divine gift. I’m working on how to take care of it. I imagine you are too. Let’s not get caught up in the extremes, but find what works for our bodies.

Lots of love!

Crazy Redheaded Lady

If you enjoyed my sarcasm, you can possibly find more by subscribing to my Vocal page or following me on Twitter, Facebook, Medium, or my personal blog Musings of a Crazy Redhead. Personally, I recommend tipping or pledging too through my Vocal page. ;)

Struggling to Write

 My brain is either too tired or too wired to write

Via Public Domain Pictures

Since I was ten years old, I have been writing stories and dreamed of being published. Many novelists have the same dream from a young age, so I am one of many. It is about finishing a work, yet I struggle to finish.

Today I am tired after substituting a kindergarten class, taking my son to the clinic, and making dinner. I want to write fiction, but that doesn’t come as easily to me. I have trained myself to write a blog post over the last six years. It is harder to get back into writing fiction seriously.

I have been too tired for sixteen years since leaving on my Latter-day Saint mission. During the mission, I only wrote letters. After I came home early, I reordered my life to cope with my new diagnosis of bipolar 2. I worked two jobs until marriage. Then I worked more, attended college, fell asleep after work, and had children. I felt tired for 9 years. After my third son, I managed to have some energy to blog and ghostwrite two novellas. Then I felt too tired during my fourth pregnancy. About two years later, I felt I could blog again. In the meantime, I wrote several chapters in several books. I made minute progress and then I lost interest.

Having bipolar 2, my brain is also wired at times. I have many shiny new ideas for novels (and blog posts) that I never finish. I start some novels but struggle to go beyond a week or month. I become bored with the project. In high school and college, I managed to write “novels” of 20,000 words. They were rough drafts that became second drafts. I sent these to publishers with no bites. I understand why I had no bites now. They were not detailed enough. As my creative writing teacher at BYU stated, the novels lacked immediacy. I had mostly dialogue, but no details to ground the reader in the setting or action.

The novels I wrote needed reworking and the plots have changed over time. I have my list of plot ideas for the novellas I wrote in high school and college. Many ideas will fall by the wayside. That’s the nature of the beast.

Currently, I have ideas for a humanoid species who have different powers, such as mind-reading, object-reading, lip-reading, mind control, and empath powers. They are in a hierarchy of who rules over another species. This idea came from the BLM riots. History could be rewritten according to the prejudices and enslaving different “readers.” So far, I have written the creation stories of the mind-readers and lip-readers.

In order to finish many of my partial drafts, I need to reacquaint myself with the characters, settings, and plots. That can take several days or weeks that I just don’t want to “waste” during the hour or so I have time each day. I also find that I want to write about issues currently troubling me. I need to itch that scratch, per se.

What I can finish easily are poems. When my mind catches onto an idea, I can usually write a poem within days. Albeit, they may be excellent poems or mediocre poems. I may rework them later. I know others who struggle writing poetry yet can write fiction quickly. I have that momentary excitement and hyperfocus that can channel writing poetry. Not so much with novels.

Editing is another aspect of my writing. I can catch some errors quickly, while others are not so obvious. Some words I misspell almost every time: piece, niece, opportunity, and so on. Yet I can spell most words with great ease. Grammarly has been very helpful with the self-editing process.

I wondered if I still had my editing prowess since I haven’t been a tutor for 17 years. Recently, a relative and friend asked me to proofread their writing. My skills came back. I recognized error patterns that I could point out and revising for a specific audience. My friend said I retained her writing style, which makes me very pleased. That is the goal of editing: to retain the writer’s style through editorial changes.

Now here I am writing another blog post about writing instead of writing fiction. I can manage some blog posts within 2–4 hours, which is why I usually devote my time to blog posts.

One day I will write fiction with ease again. When my children are older. When my youngest leaves the house. When I finish vacationing during retirement. Okay, maybe that time will never come unless I change my habits.

C’est la vie.

Medications that Interfere with Bipolar 2

 

Via Public Domain Photos

I have learned over the past 16 years what medications, beverage additives, and herbs tend to exacerbate my bipolar symptoms. Some of these through talking with doctors and others through trial and error, unfortunately. I share my experience hoping that others with bipolar, and their loved ones, can work with their doctors to discuss options when taking similar medications. So take this with a grain of salt. It is for informational purposes. Your body, or your loved one’s body, may react differently.

St. John’s Wort

My senior year of high school, I experienced a depressive episode. My mom talked with me and we discussed that I probably had depression. We weren’t sure of the severity yet. I started taking St. John’s Wart at the end of my senior year and through my freshman year at a junior college. My depression went away during that time, but I over-involved myself in college and activities. I stayed up late on weekends and was a bit louder than my reserved self. I worked a part-time job, attended my religious organization’s Institute and choir all while taking 16 credits fall semester, 21.5 college credits winter semester, and then 18.5 college credits the summer semester. I was hypomanic for a year, which was probably exacerbated by St. John’s Wort. I had small crashes where I quit my class and quit my job during the summer semester.

I stopped taking St. John’s Wart when I left for Brigham Young University and I fell into a depressive episode several months later. This time I sought for help only for my depression.

St. John’s Wort can cause mania and hypomania in bipolar patients. It is also not in normal dosages that can be relied on from company to company. St. John’s Wort is still a drug like any other pharmaceutical. If you have any mood symptoms, I would consult with a psychiatrist or a doctor and therapist combo.

Antidepressants Alone

At BYU, I related to the regular doctor that I was depressed and having suicidal ideation. The doctor prescribed an antidepressant and I went home to the APRN with that diagnosis. He kept prescribing an antidepressant. I felt happy with no complaints. My previous energy from a year ago returned. But the hypomania wouldn’t last forever.

I burned out serving a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I felt the beginning when I was in a strict schedule at the Missionary Training Center, but the “mission field” in San Antonio felt more restrictive. I was tired in the morning and awake at night. I cycled through emotions quickly. I became suicidal the last two days. Then I went to the mission home. The mission psychiatry department asked if I wanted to stay or go home. I chose to go home.

My mission companion suggested I had bipolar. I considered that and talked it over with my mom and dad. My mom and I were really convinced as we looked at symptoms online. We then met with the APRN. He was convinced when I had displayed “psychobabble.” I talked hurriedly and had to make my point.

Antidepressants alone act similar to St. John’s Wort where they can cause mania or hypomania. Bipolar patients need a mood stabilizer in addition to an antidepressant to counteract this problem. Occasionally, a doctor will only have a bipolar person on an antidepressant if they are experiencing only depression and being closely monitored.

Caffeine

When I drink caffeinated soda or have dark chocolate and chocolate in the late afternoon or evening, it can keep me up at night. I feel restless and have racing thoughts for several hours. Some nights I am still wide awake late in the evening. I review what I ate: usually I had caffeine in some form. I especially forget about the effect of chocolate, especially dark chocolate. Basically, caffeine can cause a brief hypomanic episode in bipolar patients.

Caffeine comes in so many forms, sometimes it is hard to know if I had caffeine. For example, I found little treats when my family was briefly going to the food pantry that tasted like lemons. The gummy boasted it contained yerba mate. I was suspicious it might cause problems, but I tried it anyway. Well, I couldn’t fall asleep that night. I had racing thoughts. I searched for yerba mate online, and sure enough, it has lots of caffeine. It is the same mate that citizens in several South American countries drink. My husband saw many Uruguayans drink mate (with lots of sugar) on his LDS mission in Uruguay.

I have learned I need to look at labels carefully for caffeine. Sodas are especially tricky to know about. I avoid dark chocolate now because it has more caffeine than milk chocolate. Overall, I only consume caffeinated beverages early in the day, unless I need to stay awake driving.

Coffee and some teas contain caffeine, but I avoid those for religious and health reasons.

Sudafed (Pseudophedrine)

I was always congested as a child. When I had strep throat in seventh grade, my family doctor prescribed Claritin-D. We figured I had allergies. I took it in the morning and I could finally breathe. I had fewer colds and only had occasional sinus infections. After worse congestion during my third pregnancy, I started taking Mucinex-D. Six months after I delivered my baby, I had an allergy test: I was allergic to nothing. So they looked at my nose. I had large turbinates and a Haller cell, an extra sinus cavity. I had surgery and could breathe again without any decongestant. Occasionally, I still get sinus infections. During those times, I tried Mucinex-D and Sudafed. Sometimes I took them at night. And I couldn’t fall asleep for hours.

I discovered that pseudophedrine is a stimulant similar to caffeine. It can cause hypomania in bipolar patients. I have learned that I can only take it in the morning. I have switched to phenylephrine as a decongestant. It isn’t as effective, but it helps. Nasal irrigators or netty pots help the most.

Prescription Steroids

I had a severe sinus infection and my ENT prescribed steroids to reduce the inflammation in my nasal cavities. I could breathe within hours. But I went into hypomanic episode. I wasn’t sure if it was related to the steroid, but I learned that it was.

A few years ago, I had another severe sinus infection, but my throat constricted to the point I struggled to breathe through my mouth. I went to my family doctor for relief. We debated over using a steroid because of the possibility of hypomania. I took the steroid for one or two days just so I could breathe. I felt so much relief, but I was wired until six in the morning. I stopped taking it the next day. I followed my doctor’s other advice to take 800 mg of ibuprofen. The ibuprofen reduced the inflammation so I could breathe better. But steroids are the most effective. If only there were no side effects.

Overall, I have learned that Mucinex, ibuprofen, phenylephrine, and nasal rinses combat my sinus infections without causing hypomania.

My relative with Multiple Sclerosis takes steroids and she has remained fairly stable. So there is a balance that people with bipolar can find between prescription steroids and bipolar medications.

Hormonal birth control

After my fourth baby, I bled for five months. I was baffled by this. I had an IUD placed when I was still bleeding. I figured it was just my period. The bleeding continued. My doctor prescribed a birth control pill in an effort to keep in the IUD. The bleeding lessened. However, I felt suicidal and depressed almost every day on it. I tried for two weeks, but it was too much. I believe we tried another form of birth control pill. I had an x-ray or ultrasound that showed no afterbirth remained in my uterus. Finally, my doctor referred me to a gynecologist. The gynecologist noted I had a thick endometrium. We settled on a D & C, which stopped the bleeding. The gynecologist suggested higher doses of hormonal birth control. I refused since a low dose already caused so much emotional havoc.

I had the birth control patch for the first nine months of our marriage. I figured that it didn’t affect my moods, but that other circumstances caused my problems. After all my bleeding, I wondered if the patch had exacerbated my symptoms.

I know that my body does better with only low levels of progesterone (like in Mirena). I am never going to use hormonal birth control again. I will stick with an IUD. However, my relative doesn’t have issues with her birth control, so who knows.

Overall, any female with bipolar needs to consult carefully with a gynecologist and psychiatrist on the best birth control method.

Conclusion

Different medications and substances can interfere with bipolar. I have learned through trial and error what works for me. Sometimes, I have had to find alternative ways to deal with frequent congestion, menstrual bleeding, and birth control. I am glad that my doctors have worked with me to resolve any mood disturbances. So much is observation. What works for one bipolar person may not work for another. But if any of my experiences help other people with bipolar, I am glad to share.

Managing Bipolar this Pregnancy

I wrote this after the Orlando shooting last June. I never posted this, I don't know why I didn't immediately. The next day, my peace waned.

At my first ultrasound, the maternal fetal medicine doctor said that pregnant women urinate or metabolize their medication faster during the third trimester of pregnancy. She suggested I visit my psychiatrist before 26 weeks.

My family practice doctor suggested I see the psychiatrist too. He said the pregnancy and medication guidelines have changed. There are no more pregnancy medication categories like X will kill the baby. Each medication has individual guidelines. Whatever medication keeps the mother stable and won't harm the baby. Some medicines just require extra folic acid to prevent cleft palate.

I set up the psychiatric appointment with the expectation that I would need more medication. I felt anxiety over national, local, and family events before going in.

I sought peace about these events. I reminded myself that I am not in control of the world. God is closer than we know. He is watching out for us. My mind grasped the principle of agency. God respects our agency to the point that he lets people do bad things...and good things. Good can only exist in opposition of bad.

So facing my stresses, I walked into my appointment. My psychiatrist surprised me when she said I seemed at peace and relaxed. That I was rolling with the punches...must be the third boy. She kept me on the same dosages. Really? I'm not worse. I'm even doing better?

Truthfully, I feel more at peace even though politics and other events concern me. But I can only do what I can do. I can only influence toward good. Opinions are just opinions. The serenity prayer put me at ease:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

I concentrate on the basics of my spiritual, mental, and physical health. Basically, I go to bed on time more often!

Two nights ago, I couldn't fall asleep and cried that morning. I'm done with being sweaty, uncomfortable, nauseous, and just plain pregnant. My head hurt with congestion and aches from a cold. I wanted my mom! I want the baby OUT.

My husband stayed home that day.

My home is more at peace since my husband feels more at peace too. He has sought for peace with his anxieties. He has made more progress over the past year. We just keep swimming.

I expect my boys to help out. They need to clean some before they can get on the computer. Luckily, two of them are old enough to do harder chores, carry laundry, and capture their toddler brother. Since I can't bend, they are my benders! Since I can't chase a toddler, they are my chasers!

I "called in the cavalry" for my oldest to capture his brother, and now he gladly says he will "call in the cavalry."

My boys complain some, don't always do what I ask, and other times jump at the chance to help. They choose what to do, and luckily, they usually they help out. I hope it's because of the greater peace we strive for in our home.

I go to counseling every 5-8 weeks. My insurance changed, so now I'm in the process of finding a new counselor. I like my previous counselor. I thought of paying the full price for each session, which I did for three months, but I couldn't keep up with that. It has taken me four months to finally call a new counselor.

For My Husband--the Blessings of Pregnancy

"Pregnancy" by Lisa Runnels

My husband begged me if there was anything I thought was positive about pregnancy. Well, let's see...I have a baby come out in 9 months. Isn't that the point?

He said I enjoyed feeling the baby move inside me with the other pregnancies. Yes, and that was about it.

So for my husband--I will write the positives of pregnancy.

Positive Pregnancy Experiences

1. I can get pregnant. I feel bad that other women struggle for years with infertility. I don't know what to say to them because the longest I've ever waited is 10 months to get pregnant. 
2. I can feel the baby move...and sit on my bladder.
3. I have increased saliva production that helps my teeth not rot as fast from stomach acid and the baby absorbing the nutrients from my teeth. The drool just pools on my pillow.
4. I have a heightened sniffer. I can tell my toddler's diaper is filthy from a room away. Then I ask my husband to change it. He never complains about changing them. I can smell my human body.
5. My family jumps out of my way when I start gagging. I've never seen my oldest move so fast. Maybe that's what I should do when my boys refuse to get off the computer.
6. I know all the intricacies of the toilet bowl and the right trajectory to avoid spills.
7. I get in my sit-ups when I vomit regularly throughout all my pregnancies. I lost 16 pounds with my first (and gained it back). I haven't gained weight so far this pregnancy.

So I would say the actual positive experiences happen after the baby is born. I can bend again. I can eat a normal amount. I'm full for longer than 30 minutes. I can stand the smell of my family's bodies again. I can run. I can breathe deeper. I have energy again even if I am sleep deprived.

Then I enjoy the baby and pray for the next year to go slow but to go real fast. I like my sleep. I like their independence.

My Advice for Pregnancy, Postpartum & Bipolar

"Pregnancy and Newborn" by Petr Kratochvil

I read this article this morning about having bipolar and pregnancy. She had bipolar 1, which is more complicated than bipolar 2 with symptoms and medicines. It was nice to see other women with bipolar manage pregnancy, birth and postpartum. It's quite a task that requires a lot of adjustments. I know of one woman who went off all meds to have a child, but I wouldn't recommend that!

Jennifer Marshall included three tips in her article: have a plan when bringing home the baby, consider not breastfeeding, and weigh the benefits of medication versus other medications. I'm including some of her advice with my own advice for handling mental illness during and after pregnancy.

Regular Psychiatrist Visits and Medication Management

I changed meds over the course of four months preparing to have my first child. I struggled during that whole time with hypomania and self-harm, but I knew I wouldn't have access to a psychiatrist after that four month period due to lack of insurance and funds. After two months of pregnancy, I was able to go on Medicaid and see a doctor! I dropped an antidepressant after the first two months of pregnancy, but without the recommendation of a doctor. Luckily, my doctor added a new antidepressant later, which made a huge difference.

Lesson: Have a psychiatrist monitoring meds before, during, and after pregnancy. Don't change meds too quickly or go off without monitoring.

Safe Medication During Pregnancy

I switched medication so I could have children from class D to class C and B medication, but this doesn't work for everyone. Pregnant women should work very closely with a psychiatrist and obstetrician to monitor the mother's mental health and baby's risks. I took a medication without a lot of research on it during pregnancy and third baby probably had mild effects from it. I think it might have slowed his metabolism after being born, but I don't know. My doctor encouraged me to report the effect of the medication to a research, but I didn't. I wish I had now to add to the medical literature.

In the last trimester of my first pregnancy, I went off my mood stabilizer so I could breastfeed. A few days after delivering my son, I had a day of thoughts of self-harm and harm to my firstborn. But that was the only day of those feelings! After eight weeks, I chose to resume my mood stabilizer medicine when I could feel a slight depression coming on.

Lesson:  It is worth being sane even if a medication may be riskier during pregnancy. Be willing to forego breastfeeding for sanity. A sane mother is better than a harmful, depressed, or psychotic mother!

Regular Counseling Before, During and After Pregnancy

I made the mistake of not going to a counselor for two months before my first child, which led to serious self-harm (and changing meds too quickly). Luckily, I had a neighbor who listened to the Spirit and came to talk to me at a critical moment. Even though I had no insurance, I should have sought counseling when I first felt myself slipping. After that, I did seek counseling through my church's social services. From then on, I was more stable during my pregnancy and after. 

I stuck with counseling through my second pregnancy too, but I made the mistake of not going after the eight-week mark. I had moved and was no longer insured. We were on Medicaid a month later, but I still didn't see a counselor because we were only there for my husband's short internship. I didn't seek out a counselor for another two years and while trying to get pregnant a third time, which led to a worse breakdown. Since then, I have been regularly going to a counselor through my third pregnancy and the years after.

Lesson: Counseling is too important to skimp on while you are trying to get pregnant. Hormones and feelings fluctuate too much during this trial period. I chose counseling during each pregnancy, which I'm thankful for. The postpartum period lasts longer than I thought. I needed it for a period of at least a year or more after each child.

Self-care

I cannot emphasize self-care more for the periods before, during and after pregnancy. I ate more than I should have and gained weight, causing greater depression. I also stayed up too late at nights in an attempt to have "me" time. It has backfired into tired days and weight gain. Take care of yourself spiritually, mentally, and physically. I am a much happier mom when I take care of myself first and then my kids.

Hopefully this helps other women with mental illness who are having children. It's a delicate process and you need all the support you can get. Remember to create a support network of family and friends. We are an interdependent species.

Do you have more advice?